Beautiful??

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"I don't want to be dark skinned,I want to look like you auntie nice." that remark got me off-guard. Where had she gotten that kind of reasoning? Had I behaved in a manner to make her think she was not beautiful?  I was heartbroken and concerned.  So I decided to try and plant a new seed in her mind in regard to beauty and complexion. I hugged her and and asked to come help me bathe her cousin. Enthusiastically she followed me to the bathroom.  "Why do want to look like me? " I asked her as we bathed the baby.  "Watu wa black si beautiful auntie "(dark skinned people are not beautiful auntie).  "Black is beautiful sweetheart, you always say my baby is beautiful and he has a similar complexion to you, don't you think you are beautiful? " I asked her smiling at her...  We held our conversation until we were done bathing and dressing the baby.  I then took a laptop and opened a photo gallery  of black girls her age and I was fortunate enough to get a page with children her complexion. She was excited to see how beautiful they were. I reassured her that she is beautiful and complexion should never be the measure of beauty.

I was also keen to show her women who had a complexion similar to hers and were great achievers in different industries. It was important to me that she never sees her complexion as a barrier to achieve anything she wanted in life. She was especially excited to learn about Lupita Nyong'o. I could see her eyes beam! Her smile was heartwarming!I will keep exposing her to women of different complexion and showing her that beauty comes in different shades and sizes... It is not a one size fits all type of thing. 

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  As bubbly miss sunshine was leaving my house I heard tell her mother that she has found the secret of beauty. I pray I was successful and will continue to cement in her that beauty is more than meets the eyes... Let's be careful how we remark about other people especially in front of children.  It would be sad and heartbreaking to see future generations working tirelessly to 'fix' their complexions so as to achieve this unrealistic and false measure of beauty. Reassurance and encouraging our children to take pride in how they look is a task neglected by many or overlooked as a non issue....

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